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Thursday, April 27, 2006

I seem to have a problem when it comes to friendships. Apparently, my friendships don't last as long as i want them to. Isn't that like very saddening? I meet different ppl along the way... some of which are great while others are plainly horrible by nature.

Over the years i've made many great friends. most of which i hope that i will stay just as close to them as time turns the pages of our lives. But reality just loves to bite my ass and violently pops my fantasy bubble. They don't last long.

Frankly, over the years, i have observed a pattern and i though i am reluctant to accept the way things... i feel i have to acknowledge it before i go on hurting myself further! People come and go. unfortunately I guess thats how the world works. Sad.

This makes ponder who are my true friends.
i raise questions like ...

" Is it worthwhile to commit to this friendship even it seems soo fruitful?"
" Should i even make you my friend when one day you're gonna go away?"
" Who are my true friends?how can i distinguish them?"

after taking some time alone while my what-seems-like my other half was snoozing away on the phone, i've realised something. that i put alot of heart into a friendship just quietly hoping all the effort that i've put into it would bear fruits. honestly, out of 10, only 2 return more than half the effort i put into the friendship. quite sad really.And with that, i have yet to decide on the path i wish to embark on. Till then, i'll just quietly wait at this fork of my life.

The pathways ahead of me.

to the left : to only put half the effort and wait till the other party returns half of the effort that i have put in then continuously add more effort.

to the right : to carry out what i've always been doing. Go all out in the friendship and hope for the best.

quite tricky yar?

The Left.. isn't really me. i'm Mr Nice guy. I can't help giving all that i've got. i like to be on the limit. Risky.. yes! i know but i'll feel good cos i've done my part in the friendship. But the left path seems more like an intelligent one.

Risky-radical VS Smarty-panty

Mmm.. think i'll ask god.

i am superman ;
4/27/2006 09:39:00 PM