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Sunday, January 09, 2005

Here i go ... scream my heart out...but to no avail of neither ears nor shoudlers to fall upon. The cries of my heart just ripples away and dies down to the silence that i've been banished to. Piece by piece, my life crumbles. I get emptier by the day. Is there no one? No one that i can lean on besides my untrustworthy self?

it's really really sad, that day by day...the Fact that i don't have anyone to really lean on is setting in me. I don't know why, but why does everyone seem so busy? Is it a mistake for me to actually make time? Make time for who? make time for nobody...

Now...when i'm free after im done with my revision...i always sit down alone... doing basically NOTHING but just veg out and look at my phone...just waiting...and waiting. Waiting for someone to message me or call me...but...no one does. I sit down...just watching the sun set, feeling the breeze carressing my face and frolicking my hair.

Is there anyone that i can lean on? if there is...where are they?

Now...my circle of acquintainces are getting slightly bigger...but my friends are leaving me...my close friends...the ones closest to my heart...they are all gone...gone...only to come back only...only when the wind whispers my name to them.

I wonder...why am i faced with such a challenge? Is it because i am better off on my own as the song goes? sigh~...Somehow when i'm alone... the only problems that i have...is with myself and i'm not really affecting anyone. Although there is a saying...that no matter what...someone somewhere out there... needs me. For now...i don't see anyone who needs me...in fact...i don't see anyone who needs me since last time...

I guess no one needs me right now...

i better pack-up and go to training now...

i miss Rufi alot... i think of her each time my heart beats...*muacks*


i am superman ;
1/09/2005 02:35:00 PM